Wednesday, July 27, 2011


Some of my favorite people. That is all.

Quote of the Day

Julia: "My entire office is like being inside the heart of a massive glacier. But the bathroom is disgustingly warm. And kind of smells like a bakery. So it makes me feel confused about baked goods."

Tuesday, July 26, 2011


A little "negative" never hurt anybody. Not even Mojo's eyebrows. Or is that eyeliner?

Quote of the Day

Michelle: "Not at work! I tell you this before!"

Monday, July 25, 2011


That's right, folks. Actual cooking took place in my kitchen. And those of you who know me know what that means: Carrie was over! We went with the brilliant plan of oven-roasting these vegetables when it was 101 degrees outside, in the height of sun, soon after walking in. Roast them on the stove? Why would we do that when we can get the oven really producing that heat. The heat that made me stand in a tub of ice water, wrapping ice packs around my neck with a cotton scarf, three quarters naked, wondering why everyone else around me looks so completely composed.

Quote of the Day

Upon learning that my friend has bed bugs. After talking her off a ledge, explaining my strange mosquito mites this year, high incidents of heat rash, and an influx of biting gnats. I forgot to counter in the fact that she lives in Manhattan.

Me: "This city is a cesspool of disease and misfortune.

Friday, July 22, 2011


What's wrong with this picture? Considering it was taken with my new phone that thinks heavy grains is a great thing in all of my shots, absolutely nothing!

Considering it is in a doctor's office, a little bit more. They couldn't spring the ten bucks for a tin garbage can? How about $3.99 for a plastic one? But maybe, if they remove the top ashtray part, people will have no idea what this receptacle was originally intended to be.

Quote of the Day

Me: "I don't want to get my hopes up."

Robert: "A little hope never hurt anyone. It's when they grow up that the trouble starts."

Thursday, July 21, 2011

Striped Pajamas

I may or may not have posted one of these pictures to a Social Networking site and titled it "The Man In The Striped Pajamas." But if he is not offended, nobody else should be. My grandfather has earned the right to wear these stripes if he wants to. And to flash a little jazz hands when the mood strikes. Our conversation went a little like this:

Me: "Poppy, smile! I am going to take a picture of you in those hot PJ's."
Grandpa: "Alright, but what should I do with my hands?"

And then as I snapped the picture, he snapped his wrists and shared with me a layer I never knew existed.

Quote of the Day

Scott (My architect-soon-to-be-pharmacist friend): My one coworker is like, 'I'm going to change the world.' And I was like, 'No. Scientists and engineers do that. You pick the paint.'"

Wednesday, July 20, 2011

My Super Dramatic Over-The-Top Line For The Day

I laughed.
Out loud.

But the laughter is a lie.


Liam does a damn better job advertising Smashbox Primer than anyone else ever has. All primers may prime, but do all primers fit inside a ten month old's mouth safely?

Quote of the Day

Roxana: "My new bag smells like dead cow. God! I love he smell of dead cow in the morning!"

Tuesday, July 19, 2011


Imagine this: You are a heroin addict. Not in recovery at all. And you have gone a week without your fix. And you open a door and you are met with junk o'plenty. What do you do? You dive in!

Now imagine that you have an addiction to peeling tape and shredding paper. And you open a door and the floor is lined with crunchy paper taped down all over the place. The paper is crunchy now, do you understand? And I am not in recovery. But I know the nice man who works in my building who spent time doing this. But he gets paid. But a coworker could see me at a low point. But it is crunchy paper...

Quote of the Day

Me: "I'll get right on that, Rose!"

Kirby: "Rose?"

Me: "It's a quote from "Don't Tell Mom The Babysitter's Dead."

Kirby: "Welcome to the year 2011..."

Me: "Welcome to a great movie I shouldn't have had to explain my reference for."


Me: "I am pretty sure I just murdered almost every rule in the English language."

Monday, July 18, 2011


My first attempt at a French Braid. I think they must practice with their armpit hair for years, because it's not so easy.

Quote of the Day

Me: "Wanna know something sad? I went to out last night- thought it was Thursday night when I left, realized I was wrong and that it was really Wednesday night, and then I commuted to work thinking it was Thursday. It is only Tuesday."

Melissa: "Crazy train is back. Don't worry, I don't think it had really gone far."

Friday, July 15, 2011


Today marked my first time at Pret A Manger. I was lured there by a home-brewed iced green tea with chamomile and lavender, which does not disappoint. And I opted for the Moroccan lentil soup. My Moroccan grandmother has to go in there, and in her broken French and Arabic, demand this recipe. The vacant-eyed, sweet cashier that helped me would most definitely be the right person to speak to about this.

Quote of the Day

R.G.: Shut the front door!

M.G.: So you want me to keep the back door open?

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

Stolen Snapshots

When Facebook friends provide insightful chuckles...


There is nothing quite like a MEGA JUG of sugar, corn syrup, and processed carbs to bring awareness to Juvenile Diabetes! I mean, without giving every child diabetes, how is every parent supposed to be aware of it?

Tetanus Talk

Me: "Oh no. Is this going to hurt a lot?"

Doctor: "Nope."

Me: "Well, it is hurting a little, but you were right! Not so bad..."

Doctor: "This is nothing. Your whole arm is going to be killing you tomorrow!"

Tuesday, July 12, 2011


I couldn't decide what was worse about Uncle Junior looking at me at the gynecologist's office: Uncle Junior looking at me, or Uncle Junior at the gynecologist's office. Just kidding! It's definitely Uncle Junior looking at me.

Quote of the Day

Robert: "My customers insist on telling me dirty things, I guess I have a conspiratorial tone on the phone.Example: the horse's name is Meistersinger, which means Master singer. Not to be confused with masturbater, which is a whole different kind of singing."

Monday, July 11, 2011


Now that Marley is turning white, you can kind of see her laying next to her brother. Right before I took this shot, Marley moved no less than four times. She gets up, moves away from Mojo, does a quick circle or two and then peacefully curls up. Once she lets out her obligatory sigh of contentment and celebration of personal space, Mojo gets up, circles her area, and curls up, pressing himself right into her. Fortunately for us all, Marley is way too lazy to let it last for more than ten minutes tops. True love.

Quote of the Day

While Carrie is away on her tropical Greek vacation, Scott has vowed to email her every day to remind her of the misery that is work while your best friends are away on vacation. Today's:

Scott: "Happy Monday. Today I have my appointment to get my root canal and I realized I was looking forward to that more then I do to chatting with you everyday!"

So sweet!

Thursday, July 7, 2011

A Little Dos Caminos

Dos Equis. Dos Caminos. DOH's! I am game. I (finally) made my way over to Dos Caminos Park in midtown last week. And don't let that sentence fool you. Now that I work in midtown, I eat hear less frequently than I ever have. But when I have heard the name of a restaurant enough times, I usually cajole my way into trying one out. It just so happens that this restaurant is across the street from the former Houston's, and if anyone knows me, or my father, or my brother, you would know that if we are near a Houston's, that is where we will be eating.

Thankfully, the decision was out of my hands. And into my stomach. The food was excellent and beautiful. Apparently the Margarita's are killer, but I can only attest to their Jameson being as expected on the alcohol front. For appetizers, I shared a guacamole that was amazing, which I refrained from photographing as the meal was just underway. As the alcohol warmed my shred of inhibition, I snapped a quick and klutsy shot of my main meal.

It was a black angus skirt steak with oven dried tomato and chipotle salsita, beans with pork, and the most amazing grilled asparagus I have ever eaten. Can you tell I am ready for dinner?

Quote of the Day

Mr. V.
: "So I've been taking Vicodin at work, because my stupid coworker is nothing but a ****** whiny complainer. And it used to help. But it doesn't anymore. It's bad when your coworker is so annoying a Vicodin doesn't even help."

True story.

Wednesday, July 6, 2011


My cousin Eric, the happy guy on your right, despises pictures. I never knew why, as the camera has always love him unswervingly. I took the opportunity for the majority of my family to be all huddled down in Atlanta, Georgia to ask him. Really, I brought it up because I brought down my pretty new camera and made the executive decision that I was going to take as many photos as possible. After all, the last time I was down in Georgia was, hmmm, TWENTY years ago!

Anyway, as it turns out, Eric told me he only hates posed pictures. Voila! It's pretty much damn near impossible to not be smiling next to Jordan. If only I could share with you the things he will whisper in your ear right before someone shoots a picture. It's either crack up, or crack up.

Quote of the Day

Me: "You think she is a five?!?! Out of ten?! Then what the hell am I?"

Jordan: "My sister. And what I can only hope was a rhetorical question."

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Puppy (Powder) Love

It was mid-Sunday afternoon. On the heels of Fourth of July and Christmas in July BBQ's, in preparation of a few more, I ascend my stairs with lofty ambitions. Life is good, I have a pocket of time to relax and read my book; finish up paperwork, seal up some mail; catch a quick nap with the dogs; organize some kitchen shelves and top all of that off with maybe, gasp, the completion of a show before dinner. Some people say that I have poor time management skills when it comes to my personal time, and I like to agree, but only when I am thinking clearly.

So as I walk up the stairs, I feel as if I am walking into an old ice cream parlor. I can smell vanilla and chocolate and a lingering sweetness that you can only remember from childhood desserts past. And while the average person may be somewhat taken by said aroma, this assault on my nostrils could only mean one thing: I left something wihin reach of Wonder Dog and I was going to pay for my sins. And how I wished I didn't know my dogs at all!

I step into the living room and entry hallway where I see some of my individually packaged protein shake mixes shredded into the carpeting. I say into now, whereas at the time, I thought: on top of the carpet. I can only assume all of the world's anger flashed into my eyes as both dogs fled to the safety of the back corners of their crate instantly. The carnage ensued, increasing with every few feet down my hallway, with an equal crescendo between ruining my four day old new comforter and creating a protein shake powder cement on over ten large tiles in my kitchen.

My clean-up involved vacuuming and then scraping, scrubbing and sweating over almost every inch of carpeting this powder touches, as saliva turns it int a possessed glue-like creature. But I guess everything happens for a reason: I never scheduled in any work out time. And my punishment ended up being over 4 hours of scrubbing. Marley was just looking out for my health.

On a different note: Is anyone interested in a Wonder Dog? She can climb onto seemingly impossible pieces of furniture and she is always looking out for your health (as long as one of your issues is not high blood pressure.)

Quote of the Day

As I rallied for a more practical messenger bag option...

Scott: "My bag dictates all my decisions."


My thought every night: How long would it take me to swim home?

Friday, July 1, 2011

Quote of the Day

I want Cillian Murphy for Christmas!

Out of absolutely nowhere. I love it.


This was my cousin Jillian's dress she wore to a family event. And here is where I felt old and out of touch. I thought it looked like a very nice bedazzled tank top. It was a loose, stretchy material and she did a great job of dressing it up with platforms that cramped my feet upon seeing them and matching jewelry. But I wouldn't have seen it in a store. I would have walked right by it.

This dress ended up being the superstar of the night. The DJ couldn't take his eyes off of it. Twelve year olds and sixty year old strangers alike made their way over to our table hypnotized by the sequins complimenting that dress up a storm. Everything I thought I knew about evening dresses are been hot glued away. I am (gold) lamenting.