Snapshot

This chicken came from a store in Sag Harbor, New York that sells- chickens. Not real ones, no variations in texture. Every chicken looks exactly the same, with different accessories to give it the appearance of having a certain disposition. They are all painted over with chalkboard paint, so that people can keep them in their kitchens and write shopping lists on them.

Don't get me wrong: I think they are adorable. I want one, or ten, or whatever, but a shopping list? You clearly cannot pick up this chicken and bring it with you in your shopping cart. And even if you wanted to, the moving of it would have the chalk rub right off onto your shirt, or car. If you did want to write on this chicken, you would have to then rewrite your list on an old and boring piece of paper, and then you would have to wipe down the chicken to do it all over again. And why am I dissecting this? I am jealous! Full fledged bitter, actually. Why can't I think of these things?

How about a large ceramic shampoo bottle that stands in the shower and you can change the caps on it to be different colors depicting your mood? So that way, when your spouse gets into the shower after you, they can know what to expect that morning. Or how about a plastic doll shaped like, let's say, a potato. And it's extremities can be interchanged and removed and we can call it mister for no real reason at all. Who wants to bankroll these?